The Emptiness Filled, Robert Kieffer

It seems that I have always believed in the Lord Jesus, and therefore cannot say when I first received Christ. I was raised in a Christian home, in which my family attended church regularly. I was baptized when I was around eight or nine years old, even though I didn't have the full realization of why I was being baptized. However, when I was old enough, I began to read the Bible on my own because I felt that I needed to, not because I thought reading the Bible would make me a good person. Actually, I think that I read it because I unknowingly needed the supply that God's living Word afforded me. But in spite of reading the Bible and attending church services every Sunday, I never knew that I had a spirit to contact God, and I lived a fleshly, soulish life. Although I had an inner sense to read the Bible and understand it, I didn't know what it meant to follow the Lord. As a result, I was a rebellious, strong-willed child who liked to be free and do things on his own.

At the age of eight, my brother and I began to take gymnastic lessons. After quickly progressing in the sport, in 1986, at the age of fourteen, my parents sent us away to receive more advanced and intensified training in Waco, Texas. A year later, we moved to Austin, where I was a sophomore in high school and continued to attend church services, although I really had no desire to go. I went mainly because I was obligated by my parents and trainer to go. My whole life was focused on training for gymnastics and I had no interest in religious things. I see now that this was God's sovereignty. The gymnastics training schedule was arduous and demanding, but I was willing to endure it in order to be a world champion. In seeking to satisfy this hunger within, I became quite ambitious and selfish, living a life that was completely for my exaltation. This condition worsened, as I became the first-ranked gymnast on the United States Junior National Gymnastics Team in 1989. But, regardless of my success, I realized that the successes in life do not change a person. Whether I won a competition or not, I felt no different. My inward condition remained empty and void of life. This I could not understand, and due to His mercy I began to search for the answer.

I continued to attend Christian meetings throughout high school. But after starting my undergraduate studies at the University of Texas at Austin, I began to seek the meaning of life by first abandoning religion altogether. I stopped going to church, realizing that attending church services was not making me a better person and was not able to improve my fallen condition or change my deaden mentality. However, I was still very seeking to be filled and satisfied. I would engage in many worldly activities to temporarily give my soul some pleasure. But soon, no worldly pleasure was able to satisfy the emptiness within, not even the victories I obtained in international competition. I came to see the vanity in the world and the emptiness that it offered. As lonely as it was, it was a great blessing bestowed upon me from the Lord because I soon realized that what I was longing for was Christ Himself. Although I knew nothing about my spirit, I could sense that there must be something more of God than worshipping Him through outward religious practices (John 4:24).

Faithfully, the Christians who are involved with the group Christians on Campus pass out tracts at the beginning of each semester. For three years, I didn't want to have anything to do with them. However, during my fourth year at the University of Texas at Austin, I became so hungry and desperate for the Lord I was willing to even take a tract from Christians on Campus. After taking one, I didn't even read it. I only found the number to call and asked when and where their meetings were held.

I first went to a meeting on Sunday. At that meeting, everything was so strange. Nothing resembled the services I was used to. I was uncomfortable at first, but the Lord mercifully kept me there. As the brothers and sisters began sharing their experiences of Christ, their speaking really touched my spirit. What they were speaking was exactly what I needed, which was Christ. I had never heard anything like it. Immediately, I had the sense that this was what I had always longed for. My emptiness was finally filled and my hunger was finally satisfied.

As I continued my studies at U.T., I slowly began to meet with the local church, which began consistently to transform my life of living in a worldly way to living in a godly way. After receiving my undergraduate degree, a year later I entered graduate school also at the University of Texas at Austin. During my time in graduate school, the Lord planted a seed in my heart to go to the Full-Time Training in Anaheim (FTTA). Although at first I resisted firmly, the seed began to grow and develop until I soon submitted to His desire. Three days after receiving my Master's degree, I was at the FTTA living the life that was meant for me all along. Great is His faithfulness.

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